A Poem on Purpose

For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide/ When the Rainbow is Enuf [segment]

~Ntozke Shange

lady in blue

...

you were always inconsistent

doin somethin and then bein sorry 

beatin my heart to death

talkin bout you sorry

well 

i will not call

i'm not goin be nice

i will raise my voice

& scream & holler

& break things & race the engine

& tell all yr secrets bout yrself to yr face

& i will list in detail everyone of my wonderful lovers

& their ways 

i will play oliver lake

loud

& i won't be sorry for none of it

i loved you on pupose

i was open on purpose

i still crave vulnerability & close talk

& i'm not even sorry bout you bein sorry

you can carry all the guilt and grime ya wanna

just don't give it to me

i can't use another sorry

next time 

you should admit 

you're mean/ low-down/ triflin/ & no count straight out

steada bein sorry alla the time

enjoy bein yrself

.

Choreopoem

I finished reading the book adaptation of Ntozake Shange's 1975 play For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf today. The 20 poem "choreopoem" is performed by seven women; the women are only depicted as colors such as Lady in Blue, not by names. I found the use of colors juxtapose to the darkness of the stage and dark times the women encounter in their indvidual lives, ingenious. How disheartening for the characters to be together on stage but so alone in their own worlds. It is as if each woman cuts her internal being open and the loss, sorrow, pain, and unrequited love spills onto the stage. One of the quotes that struck me the most from the play was: "Bein alive & bein a woman & bein colored is a metaphysical dilemma I haven't conquered yet." Such turmoil and sadness; but the end of the play depicts a sense of discovery and renewal for each woman. 

I had started reading a few weeks back, but when I saw the talented cast of women for Tyler Perry's upcoming theatrical film version, upon reading, I saw these actresses in my mind for their respective characters. However, many of the quotes I've seen in the theatrical trailer are not delivered by the same characters in the play/book. I suppose that will happen often in the film. Nonetheless, the deep, raw emotions and dialogue depicted are heart wrenching no matter who is communicating them. I think Shange's play is superb and I look forward to seeing Perry's "For Colored Girls" film. I will be interested in hearing or reading Shange's thoughts and feelings on the film.